Sloshing Around

I feel kind of like I've been drugged lately. The other day I reminded myself it's not just that I'm being weak and stupid... it's totally understandable to think of him so much when he is getting married in just a few weeks. I was in a hot-tub on top of a houseboat this weekend. The water was really rough at one point and we were all getting sloshed and tossed around in the hot-tub. Water was spilling out; it was a total mess. I felt like that has been my insides since learning about his engagement. I also find now that I am literally expecting his call. Like, somewhere in me I'm certain he will be the next person who is on the phone when I pick it up at work. Having stupid expectations only leads to hurt and disappointment. And sloshiness.


  1. Anonymous12:37 PM

    Two years out, I still think the next call will be him. Hope is the hardest thing to kill sometimes.

  2. I'm roughly two years out as well. I just wish it would fizzle.

  3. Anonymous4:36 PM

    One year out but it still feel like yesterday...


  4. WHy did you people end these affairs ? Reading this Im feeling like I need better reasons than the ones I have !! I have no kids , just a really good loving man who Im hurting on a daily basis at the moment !!

  5. I am now sane. That is why.