Please tell me no

I'm thinking about contacting him. Just a quick email from my school account, which will be closed automatically by the school in about 3 months. Hi, I heard your good news. Just wanted to say congratulations and I wish you the best.

This is a TERRIBLE idea. Right? Someone talk me down.


  1. Anonymous1:14 PM

    It's a really terrible idea. Don't do it. He can't say anything you need to hear, and it will just re-open the wound.

    I know it's tempting - I do. But it will only hurt you more.

  2. I think I'm past the urge now. It was really strong over the weekend. Not to say it won't come back... but for now, I rode the initial wave and landed safely here in no contact land still. You are right. God, why is that so hard to see and understand sometimes?

  3. Anonymous2:24 PM

    It does seem to come in waves. Some days are much harder than others, that's for sure. Some days it feels like a death march, grimly watching each minute go by on the clock, battling the urge, waiting until you're with DH and can't make contact. I didn't expect it to still be this hard some days, this far out.

  4. I didn't either. You're helping me though... I hope it helps you to have someone in a similar situation to talk to.

  5. Anonymous11:01 AM

    It does help - thanks for being brave enough to "put it out here".

    I've done all the right things. Followed the party line. Am down with the program.

    I've watched it work for others. But nobody really wants to talk about what happens when it doesn't work...

  6. I wish it did work. I wish my heart was on board with my brain. Because my brain has some really good points. But god DAMN I miss that rush. I know it wouldn't have lasted with him. Blah blah blah, meanwhile I continue to obsess about his upcoming wedding and ask myself if I made the biggest mistake of my life.

  7. Anonymous9:19 AM

    Yes. Me too. Our stories are very similar. Sigh.