5.30.2009

You can move past this

To all of you that have made comments... thank you. You have no idea how healing it is to know there are others out there in the same situation. And if my story can help you at all, that is incredible. Someone made it sound like this was some big strong choice I made. I just want to be clear that I didn't make the choice. I was too weak, and I think most of us are. Ending an affair on your own with no pressure, in my opinion, is next to impossible. The other man was like a drug for me. It never would have ended unless I had the train wreck I had. For those of you still in the affair, I guess if you can try to end it, that would certainly be less painful than what I went through. I can tell you that on the other side, after all the pain, it really can be better. I never would have expected that... knowing that if and when my husband found out, things could improve. I wish he hadn't found out in some ways, but in others... I'd still be pretty miserable, so maybe I'm glad he knows now and we were able to move past it. Anyway, thank you for reading and commenting. We can all help heal each other.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous2:52 AM

    I had a 4 month on-line emotional affair. We met once but didnt have full sex but of course its still cheating. I got clingy which scared him off and he ended it. I told my husband and have been working hard to make things better between us. Ive been at my lowest point since it ended a month ago, even on anti-depressants and waiting for counselling. I was feeling much better and knew I had to face AP soon so, thinking I was ready, took the plunge last week. He sent me a nice response and now I cant stop thinking about him, crying, cant sleep, feel differently about my husband. It really is like an addiction and Im back to wanting my AP back. Its like Ive taken a huge step back. I guess I never really wanted it to end. The pain is so bad. What do I do?

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  2. I'm sorry you are going through so much pain. This is difficult- perhaps one of the most difficult things you will ever do. But the only way forward is to cut off your exAP. Delete the email account he has. Make a new one. Change your phone number. Block him on Facebook. Never, never, never contact him again. If he finds a way to contact you, tell him you are going to share every detail with your husband. Then stick to it. It is a hard road, but it gets easier. Good luck.

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